Nurturing Birth

Doula Courses | Education | Doula

…here to nurture, inform and empower doulas and families

07305 044482 | [email protected]

About Doulaing

Breastfeeding support and antenatal preparation – a video blog

Sophie discusses some of the challenges facing breastfeeding mothers and how getting qualified support and information can help.  She looks at what can be done antenatally to prepare, including expression of colostrum.  In celebration of International Breastfeeding Week 2017 she highlights how much amazing free support there is available to women via the charitable organisations both in the UK and internationally.  For more information about free support visit www.breastfeedingnetwork.org.uk, www.abm.me.uk, www.nct.org.uk, www.lalecheleague.org

For an excellent guest blog post on bed sharing and breastfeeding by Lactation Consultant and ABM Chair Emma Pickett click here 

Wonder Women – doulas are superhuman! A video blog

Sophie explores the superhuman qualities of doulas in this video blog.  What do doulas really do? What can they offer you and how do they help you to plan the birth that’s right for you?

Watch Sophie’s explanation of how doulas can help you during your pregnancy, birth and beyond.

For more information about doulas visit www.nurturingbirthdirectory.com or contact us at [email protected]
https://vimeo.com/220108512

Don’t call me an expert!!!

Image thanks to www.suitcasesandsippycups.com

I think I am becoming more pernickety in my old age.  I really care about the language used around birth to the point that my own family tease me relentlessly – they’ve cottoned on to the fact that I hate the word “delivery” and will therefore take every chance to use it in front of me, hoping to provoke a reaction.  Most of the time I try to ignore it – sometimes I take the bait and the teasing persists!  Much has been written about the use of the words delivery and deliver when it comes to birth – how galling for a mother who has been labouring for hours to have someone come in and say “I’m going to deliver your baby now”.  What does that imply she has been doing?  Does it say that her body is somehow less than and it requires someone else to get involved for the main event?  Does it reduce birth to something akin to pizza or parcel postage?

Yesterday I was listening to a Marie Forleo video blog where she talked about research that has been done around the difference between “I don’t” and “I can’t”.  Apparently those that say “I don’t” are far more empowered and likely to stick to a resolution rather than those who say “I can’t”, so if I am trying to avoid eating more chocolate (I’m not – that would be crazy) I should say “I don’t eat chocolate” rather than “I can’t”.  The power that two different letters makes is significant.

Empowering is one of the key words we discuss on our doula courses and we talk a lot about how a doula’s behaviour and language can disempower a woman or couple.  Let’s take advice-giving for example.  If someone says to their doula “what do you advise?” that immediately puts the doula in the position of authority – raises her up on to a pedestal of sorts.  To my mind there are three possible scenarios if a doula gives advice.

  • The client takes the advice, follows it through and finds it to be the answer to all her prayers.
  • The client takes the advice, follows through but the results are not positive or helpful
  • The client doesn’t take the advice and chooses a different path.

It’s easy to look at scenarios 2 and 3 and see how those situations might be detrimental to the doula-client relationship, but what about the first?   Some might say, “fantastic, job done, everyone’s happy”.  But is it really?  I’m not so sure.  How has the client been empowered and supported in that situation.  If clients reach out to the doula for increasingly more advice they start to lose or not trust their own instincts and abilities to come to an answer that is right for them. The doula is placed in the “expert” role and the client takes less responsibility for decisions which might have a long-term effect on their lives and relationships.

Being an expert implies that you are an authority on a subject, that you know a great deal.  As a doula I love to learn, to read, to take courses and workshops, to discuss all things pregnancy, birth and postnatal with others who share my interest.  But, over time I have come to realise that there is a vast difference between theory and practice.  Just because someone has written the ultimate book on parenting doesn’t mean that they will have the right answers for you and your baby, particularly as the baby won’t have read the book!  I have also come to a place of feeling that the more I read the less I know.  Each topic I explore opens new doors for further investigation.  So it is not with false modesty that I say “don’t ask me for advice”.  I invite conversation on a topic, I want to know what you know and what you think, what you believe and where those beliefs come from.  I want to signpost information for you to explore options and choices, and ultimately I want to support you in making the decision which feels right for you.  My feelings on a subject don’t matter – the decision is not being made for me, but for you, your family and your baby.

So, don’t call me an expert – the only person who is an expert on the baby is the parent/primary care-giver.  I may be there in a supportive capacity, but my ultimate role is to empower the true expert in the picture.

To contact Sophie, or Nurturing Birth about anything pregnancy, birth, postnatal or doula related email [email protected]

To find out more about Nurturing Birth doula courses visit the website

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Postnatal Doulas article in Juno Magazine

We were so thrilled to be asked to write an article about Postnatal doulas for the Autumn edition of Juno Magazine. There was a lot of lovely feedback on social media, and a recognition that the postnatal doula is a bit of an unsung heroine! We hope that the awareness of doulas continues to spread.

The lovely folks at Juno Magazine have given us permission to share the article with you.
JUNO article Post_natal_doula

Who are Juno Magazine and what do they do?
JUNO is a natural parenting magazine that inspires and supports families through its range of features, columns and artwork. Established in 2003, it is published four times a year, in March, June, September and December. The editorial is broad, covering all aspects of family life for all ages. JUNO is loved by many readers for its articles that share personal experiences and reflections, and for the beautiful and striking images and illustrations from a range of artists.

JUNO offers fresh perspectives in this fast-paced technological world, creating a non-judgemental community for those who are keen to follow “a natural approach to family life”. There are columns on home-education, empowered birth, teens and nutrition; interviews, craft and recipe ideas and a mix of features that can help readers make informed choices as they journey through the challenges of parenting.

JUNO is available through WH Smiths, independent retailers, online at www.junomagazine.com and as a digital edition.
https://itunes.apple.com/gb/app/juno-magazine/id694718174?mt=8
http://www.exacteditions.com/read/juno

All subscribers receive free access to the full back catalogue of issues in digital format.

Postnatal doulas in Juno Magazine

issue_41

We are delighted to have our article “Mothering the Mothers” in the current issue of Juno magazine (http://www.junomagazine.com/out-now-issue-41/).  In it Sophie discusses the role that postnatal doulas fulfil, particularly now that most of us no longer live in communities or villages where there is extended family to support new parents.  Sophie talks about the different ways in which postnatal doulas can support new mothers – providing emotional, practical and information support to empower and nurture families.  

For your copy visit Juno Magazine’s website where you can subscribe for digital or paper copies.

The Independent publishes and article on doulas

By Sophie Brigstocke

Photo of Sophie Brigstocke. Sophie is a white woman with long, light brown hair and she's wearing a blue top.

In Monday’s Independent (20th April 2015) Hannah Fearn discussed how more women are employing doulas to support them during birth due to the fear of not having support from midwives.  Whilst we welcome positive reports of doulas in the mainstream press there are a few comments that need clarification.  

It is certainly true that the use of doulas is increasing in the UK, and internationally, as pregnant women and people empower themselves and take responsibility for their birth experiences.  However, doulas are not a new concept – there is much evidence to show that experienced local women have supported those giving birth since time began.  Research consistently shows that having a doula present at a birth decreases the length of labour, reduces the number of caesarean sections, medical interventions and/or need for pain medication.  It also shows that women and people have better breastfeeding/chestfeeding initiation rates with a much higher percentage continuing to breastfeed/chestfeed at 6 weeks plus.  

It is imperative though, that a doula be recognised as a non-medical support.  A doula does not undergo a medical training and never replaces the role of the midwife.  She or he is there to provide emotional and practical support and to empower a woman or person to make informed choices. This is something that has been recognised by the charity Birthrights as being key to a woman or person’s positive mental state after birth.  It is true that the current NHS provision for the majority of people means that they are not supported by a named midwife through their antenatal, perinatal and postnatal experience.  Often they meet the midwife who is going to be at the birth of the baby on the day itself.  Having someone by their side who has heard their concerns, hopes and expectations in advance of the birth can certainly allay fears and promote a positive environment for birth.  

Doulas aim to work alongside midwives, supporting them in their challenging role and enabling everyone to be their best on the day.  Many doulas work hard to establish positive relationships with their local midwife teams, becoming members of the MSLC or Maternity Forums at their local hospital trusts, and setting up mutually beneficial events.

The subject of cost came up and the implication seems to be that doulas are looking to charge exploitatively. There are doulas who charge between £1000 and £2000, but the vast majority charge less than £1000, with many new doulas charging significantly less than £500.  The birth doula role typically involves several meetings with the client antenatally, being available on the phone or email, going on call for up to 5 weeks, attending the birth (however long that may be), then returning to visit the clients postnatally a couple times to ensure that all is well.  It requires a doula to ditch their day-to-day life at a moment’s notice with no idea of when they are able to return home.

Sadly, the benefits of the postnatal doula were not discussed. This is the invaluable support that a doula can bring to a new family, helping them to settle in to their new parenting roles, providing information, supporting feeding, taking on some of the domestic responsibilities, making food, helping to look after other children etc.  This cannot be overlooked, and goes far beyond the midwifery remit.

For information about the Doula Preparation courses provided by Nurturing Birth please email us on [email protected] or call 07305 044482.